Lex always knew she wanted to be a mother, but that path led her to many years of infertility struggles — through multiple failed rounds of IVF and countless moments when she considered whether to give up. She didn't. She's currently pregnant with her second child — a boy — due in November.
When did you become a mother, and how many children (or step-children) and grandchildren do you have?
I had the grand luxury of becoming a mother February 24th, 2023 to our sweet, baby boy Bridger. And his little brother is due November 2024!!
What was your path like to become a mother/step-mother/grandmother?
My path to becoming a mother was circuitous at best. Basically, every single thing that could possibly go wrong, did. We experienced years of infertility and devastating attempts doing IVF. We finally hired an egg donor and did a successful embryo transfer into my belly only to have my water break seven weeks early. I moved into the hospital for weeks on bedrest and my son finally arrived after a dramatic emergency c-section where he spent the first couple of weeks in the NICU and two weeks at home on oxygen. I share all of this to encourage anyone experiencing their own challenges becoming a mom especially if you feel like giving up because I did —1000x times!! And what I can say on the other side is that while my journey just to the starting line of motherhood was a wild, hard and at times painfully heartbreaking… I can also confidently say that now seeing my beautiful, healthy, fourteen-month-old son giggle and call me “mama;” (I promise) makes everything I went through absolutely worth it. Times infinity.
There are endless avenues to becoming a mom, and if that is your heart’s desire, it will happen. It just may not look like how you thought it would — but for what it’s worth, I’ve found that it still turned out better than anything I could have imagined.
Who were some of the mother figures in your life? What essential lesson did they (or one of them) teach you?
My mom, hands down. She is my best friend and my greatest inspiration. My mom got pregnant at sixteen and raised five children as a single mom, while working two jobs. She is a warrior and has always loved us ferociously. One of the many lessons she has taught me is not to sweat the small things. She told me that I’ll say and do a thousand things I wish I could have done different or better as a mom. But as long as my sons know that they are deeply, profoundly, unconditionally loved by my husband and me, then we have built them a solid foundation from which they can build their own, beautiful life.
My mom is my best friend and greatest inspiration. She got pregnant at sixteen and raised five children as a single mom, while working two jobs. One of the many lessons she has taught me is not to sweat the small things.
What advice or words of encouragement would you give to a woman hoping to become a mother someday?
First off, I’m so sorry if it’s been a tough journey to motherhood and things don’t look the way you thought they would. I wish I could hug you. It’s also a hard pill to swallow to be reminded just how little control we have — over anything really. Trust me. I know!! What was helpful to me was to let go of the “how” and the “when.” I always thought I’d be able to conceive naturally, but it wasn’t the case. I always thought I’d have children years younger than when I did, but that also wasn’t the case. Fortunately, there are endless avenues to becoming a mom and if that is in fact your heart’s desire, it will happen. It just may not look like how you thought it would… and for what it’s worth, I’ve found that it actually turned out better than anything I could have imagined.
In your own words, how would you define “motherhood”?
Motherhood is a relentless commitment to showing up to love, support and nurture a tiny human even and especially when you don’t feel like it. Haha.
